When I have my own company, I will not tolerate sucking-up, backstabbing, crab-mentality.
When we're in a meeting, people should be able to express their ingenuity and people should be open with anyone's opinion or suggestion. When I have managers, I will not tolerate abusive behavior, credit-grabbing attitudes, close-mindedness, or manipulative/wise comments/questions/advice/suggestions that will only boost their ego and demean others. I will not tolerate unethical practices or bullying.
Saturday, August 17, 2013
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Late Night Rant
Fuck my life.
I feel lonely, unfulfilled, unhappy, meaningless, and would like to die.
Why can't I get what I want in the workplace? I am more talented that any of my peers who are the same age and have the same years of work experience as I am. I deserve to be in a better place or promoted. I contributed a lot in the workplace, helped a lot with my colleagues' trading, and marketed the company without asking for anything in return/getting paid. I am now feeling unmotivated and under-appreciated. I just want to get what I deserve. That's all I need to be happy with my life. Please.
What the fuck is the problem of the older traders in my workplace? Fucking plastic, narcissistic, selfish, crab-mentality, manipulative, untrustworthy, backstabbing, conceited, user, unethical bitch and he-bitches. I hope they fucking lose all their capital and their clients' capital. They fucking don't deserve to earn money in this industry. My peers have to fucking suck-up to the older traders just to earn their favor and get ahead in the workplace even though if the older traders are fucking irrational and have bad attitudes. To get ahead, it seems you need to be submissive and always be on the wrong side even though you're right when dealing with your superiors. They fucking need an ego-boost and can't swallow their pride. What a fucked-up real world.
I feel lonely, unfulfilled, unhappy, meaningless, and would like to die.
Why can't I get what I want in the workplace? I am more talented that any of my peers who are the same age and have the same years of work experience as I am. I deserve to be in a better place or promoted. I contributed a lot in the workplace, helped a lot with my colleagues' trading, and marketed the company without asking for anything in return/getting paid. I am now feeling unmotivated and under-appreciated. I just want to get what I deserve. That's all I need to be happy with my life. Please.
What the fuck is the problem of the older traders in my workplace? Fucking plastic, narcissistic, selfish, crab-mentality, manipulative, untrustworthy, backstabbing, conceited, user, unethical bitch and he-bitches. I hope they fucking lose all their capital and their clients' capital. They fucking don't deserve to earn money in this industry. My peers have to fucking suck-up to the older traders just to earn their favor and get ahead in the workplace even though if the older traders are fucking irrational and have bad attitudes. To get ahead, it seems you need to be submissive and always be on the wrong side even though you're right when dealing with your superiors. They fucking need an ego-boost and can't swallow their pride. What a fucked-up real world.
Sunday, August 11, 2013
The Coffee Shop
August 10, 2013, around 2:00 pm.
At starbucks. Sitting beside a window pane with two cushioned chairs in front of me. Behind the chairs was a large, light-brown wooden panel that served as a backdrop for the cushioned chairs. Hanged on the large panel were four 12x12 inched blocks that had modern-abstract art on them. The art was quite cheap looking, but it will do for the setting of a decent commercial coffee shop. While reading a business book that would help my career as a stockbroker, my mind drifted off and I daydreamed of myself with a girl:
We just had one round of sex and we were lying side by side, face to face on our bed and I could see her beautiful face and her breasts. Her left breast can be conspicuously seen. Round and soft. Her nipple was erect and my mouth was watering with the thought of sucking, licking it, and softly kissing it. I started talking to her of the time when we were in the coffee shop.
"I remember that moment when we were in a coffee shop, just talking. That was my comfort zone. You were very pretty. Smooth, silky, white skin. Your face and body glowing when streaks of sunlight passed through the window pane and hit your skin. Your long, black, wavy hair that was curled-inward on both ends resembled an inverted Chanel logo. Your hair lied near the top of your breasts, which accentuated your soft, plump, modestly sized breasts. Your lips were small, glossy, and pink. At that moment, I wanted to kiss you and even caress your breasts, but I couldn't. I was controlling myself. But the moment was bliss. I enjoyed each moment when we were together in the coffee shop, just talking."
My right hand was then slowly drifting towards her and the tip of my right index finger was touching her silky, soft, left arm. My eyes were intesely fixed on her nipple, but I was controlling my hunger because I wanted our love-making to be as romantic as possible. Like in a state of trance, my finger effortlessly graced from her lower left arm towards her left shoulder, then my right hand smoothly went to cup her left breast before gently squeezing it. I released my grip, and swiftly moved my body on top of her. She was now beneath me and my two arms were stretched out on each of her side as if trapping her between my two arms.
Then I conitnued my story in the coffee shop to her,
"I like the feeling of infatuation all over my body. I breathed heavily and in a faster pace. My arms were stiff and felt stronger. I even felt my manhood become placid, then a sudden surge of heat to my groin. It was hardening, but I was controlling myself not to feel too excited. At that time, I felt I was your man. I wanted to put my arms around your shoulder and bring you closer to me. There was a prime feeling inside me that wanted you to be in my arms, to protect you, to care for you, and to love you.
And at that moment, my penis was long, hard, stiff, and throbbing crazily. My mind was intensely focus on one thought: having a second round of love-making with her. I had to put it inside her hairy, wet, soft, and warm pussy.
At this time, her face had a sexy expression of a flirt as if she was taunting me to give it to her, but wouldn't give a fuck if I did. While eye to eye, both her hands with slender fingers caressed my chest and moved gracefully to feel my shoulders, my chest again, then to my abs. I readied myself while on fours. I jerked my hips forward to be closer to her and rested my penis on top of her clitoris, then I kissed her. While our lips touched each other, she slowly opened her legs to wrap it around my waist. Now, lip-locked, tongue-locked, and her legs locked, I moved my hips slowly towards her and thrusted myself inside her. The kissing and intercourse gradually intensified and both our breathing were becoming heavier. I released my tongue from her mouth and my hands grabbed her waist while thrusting my hips back and forth. I was greatly aroused by her curvy features and she was a beautiful specimen. Her left hand was squeezing her right breast while her right hand was grabbing my left arm tightly, nails into skin-deep. She moaned and moaned while I grunted. I grabbed her hips more tightly, then outstretched my back and thrusted my hips back and forth more profusely. I climaxed, and then with an orgasmic expression on my face, I released my seed inside her. I never felt so ecstatic and blissful for a short period in any moment of my life. It was a nirvanah moment. We were one and I felt we were right for each other in this world filled with confusion and chaos. I felt the world to be in harmony when we were together. As my libido gradually slowed down, I looked at her in the eyes. I saw her smiling with a gleaming eyes. She wrapped her hands around my neck, then we kissed again. Finally, I removed my tongue and my face slowly headed towards her hard, plump left breast. Nipple stick erect, I sucked it, licked it, and kissed it with her hands on the back of my head.
Back to reality. 4:14 pm. Still at starbucks, realized that I spent two hours describing my daydream. My friend told me to write down what I'm thinking to get it off of my mind and to focus on what I'm supposed to do. I hope he is right. Even if he is right, I can't believe I had to spend two hours just to get rid of it. I hope my libido does not kick-in any time soon. There's only 1/5th of my caramel frappucino left. And for the moment, that's the only sucking I am getting. Back to reading my book.
At starbucks. Sitting beside a window pane with two cushioned chairs in front of me. Behind the chairs was a large, light-brown wooden panel that served as a backdrop for the cushioned chairs. Hanged on the large panel were four 12x12 inched blocks that had modern-abstract art on them. The art was quite cheap looking, but it will do for the setting of a decent commercial coffee shop. While reading a business book that would help my career as a stockbroker, my mind drifted off and I daydreamed of myself with a girl:
We just had one round of sex and we were lying side by side, face to face on our bed and I could see her beautiful face and her breasts. Her left breast can be conspicuously seen. Round and soft. Her nipple was erect and my mouth was watering with the thought of sucking, licking it, and softly kissing it. I started talking to her of the time when we were in the coffee shop.
"I remember that moment when we were in a coffee shop, just talking. That was my comfort zone. You were very pretty. Smooth, silky, white skin. Your face and body glowing when streaks of sunlight passed through the window pane and hit your skin. Your long, black, wavy hair that was curled-inward on both ends resembled an inverted Chanel logo. Your hair lied near the top of your breasts, which accentuated your soft, plump, modestly sized breasts. Your lips were small, glossy, and pink. At that moment, I wanted to kiss you and even caress your breasts, but I couldn't. I was controlling myself. But the moment was bliss. I enjoyed each moment when we were together in the coffee shop, just talking."
My right hand was then slowly drifting towards her and the tip of my right index finger was touching her silky, soft, left arm. My eyes were intesely fixed on her nipple, but I was controlling my hunger because I wanted our love-making to be as romantic as possible. Like in a state of trance, my finger effortlessly graced from her lower left arm towards her left shoulder, then my right hand smoothly went to cup her left breast before gently squeezing it. I released my grip, and swiftly moved my body on top of her. She was now beneath me and my two arms were stretched out on each of her side as if trapping her between my two arms.
Then I conitnued my story in the coffee shop to her,
"I like the feeling of infatuation all over my body. I breathed heavily and in a faster pace. My arms were stiff and felt stronger. I even felt my manhood become placid, then a sudden surge of heat to my groin. It was hardening, but I was controlling myself not to feel too excited. At that time, I felt I was your man. I wanted to put my arms around your shoulder and bring you closer to me. There was a prime feeling inside me that wanted you to be in my arms, to protect you, to care for you, and to love you.
And at that moment, my penis was long, hard, stiff, and throbbing crazily. My mind was intensely focus on one thought: having a second round of love-making with her. I had to put it inside her hairy, wet, soft, and warm pussy.
At this time, her face had a sexy expression of a flirt as if she was taunting me to give it to her, but wouldn't give a fuck if I did. While eye to eye, both her hands with slender fingers caressed my chest and moved gracefully to feel my shoulders, my chest again, then to my abs. I readied myself while on fours. I jerked my hips forward to be closer to her and rested my penis on top of her clitoris, then I kissed her. While our lips touched each other, she slowly opened her legs to wrap it around my waist. Now, lip-locked, tongue-locked, and her legs locked, I moved my hips slowly towards her and thrusted myself inside her. The kissing and intercourse gradually intensified and both our breathing were becoming heavier. I released my tongue from her mouth and my hands grabbed her waist while thrusting my hips back and forth. I was greatly aroused by her curvy features and she was a beautiful specimen. Her left hand was squeezing her right breast while her right hand was grabbing my left arm tightly, nails into skin-deep. She moaned and moaned while I grunted. I grabbed her hips more tightly, then outstretched my back and thrusted my hips back and forth more profusely. I climaxed, and then with an orgasmic expression on my face, I released my seed inside her. I never felt so ecstatic and blissful for a short period in any moment of my life. It was a nirvanah moment. We were one and I felt we were right for each other in this world filled with confusion and chaos. I felt the world to be in harmony when we were together. As my libido gradually slowed down, I looked at her in the eyes. I saw her smiling with a gleaming eyes. She wrapped her hands around my neck, then we kissed again. Finally, I removed my tongue and my face slowly headed towards her hard, plump left breast. Nipple stick erect, I sucked it, licked it, and kissed it with her hands on the back of my head.
Back to reality. 4:14 pm. Still at starbucks, realized that I spent two hours describing my daydream. My friend told me to write down what I'm thinking to get it off of my mind and to focus on what I'm supposed to do. I hope he is right. Even if he is right, I can't believe I had to spend two hours just to get rid of it. I hope my libido does not kick-in any time soon. There's only 1/5th of my caramel frappucino left. And for the moment, that's the only sucking I am getting. Back to reading my book.
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